Ankles and the liver

Ooo, new sensation today. The Ankles. Not had this before and am curious.

Everytime I stand up, my ankle gives way - I haven't been skiing, boarding or cross country running for a while, even Fencing (take that you rotter, not enclosing sheep) has passed into history of late, so it can't be that. I wonder if it is 'referred pain'?

Referred pain has self-referred on many an occasion to the groin and my knee and occasionally has crept down the shin but never actually made 'ankle contact'.

It is a most peculiar sensation and reminds me of my ballet days when hours and hours on points would leave me with numb feet, no feeling below the ankles and a curious sensation of walking on painful clouds.

This is a good article on referred pain and it is interesting to see how many medical trainees don't believe in it. Hmm. Explains a lot.

Also had telephone call from the GP. Apparently, being on 50mg Diclofenac 3 times a day means I should have a Liver Function test every 6 months. Well, four years later, they've decided I need one. Obviously, they are about to have a drugs audit and have noticed I'm missing some data. Deep Joy. Score one for the slapdash.

Diclofenac is an NSAID and has a number of issues if you take it long term. Liver damage being one of them.

Others include rotting away of the stomach lining, for which I take Omniprazole a proton pump inhibitor, which has its own issues in turn.

Medicine is a little like the introduction of the Cane Toad. Cane toads were imported by the Australian Bureau of Sugar Experimental Stations to eat cane beetles which were costing farmers money in terms of lost crops. Now, the Cane Toads are a bigger problem than the beetles ever were and the whole thing is a cycle of ever increasing disaster.

Hmm. Reminds me of something :)

So off to the surgery, fortunately I work from home on a Monday, proffer the arm and blood is extracted to a test tube. Results by the end of the week I am informed. Given that I am not yellow, my alcohol consumption is generally average and I don't glow in the dark, things are probably ok but we'll wait and see.

Whilst there, I ask for a referral for an X ray on my ankle. Having only one leg has turned me into one of those 'helicopter mums' who shadow their precious object to ensure no harm can befall it.

The receptionist gives me the look that clearly implies I am using the NHS resouces at far too great a rate and taking more than my fair share. She indicates with the angle of her chin that when she loses her job in the next round of pay cuts, it will be entirely my fault. Thank goodness she doesn't know that my latest artificial leg cost £42,000 and will only last 5 years. Even thinking about it in her presence makes me feel guilty (mostly) but sometimes (pleased) when she is slow to answer the phone or a query :)

Secret knowledge. As a patient, there is little that is secret: blood, gases, health, habits, behaviours, even having your bottom looked at when they inspect your hip and don't even get me started on the indignities of child birth! It's good to have a secret - she'll never admit me to the surgery when the PCT accounts are published later this year :)